Humility is the knowing of the epistemic gap
Humility is the knowing that you don't know a lot of things not a false pretension to deceive people into praising you.
The contemporary view of humility seems to be to pretend as if one knew little instead of realizing it. Here fake it till you make it doesn't seem to work as, the more you pretend to be humble without realizing how little you know—not relatively, but absolutely—-the ego grows by holding onto the relative superiority.
Most of the issue of not understanding the fragility of one's epistemic confidence arises due to comparision, but more often than not Comparison based on accomplishment does not have a baselineComparison based on accomplishment does not have a baseline
I would just note that you have an image of some "great X" that you are trying to live up to, when really, there is no frame of reference to standardize a measure for X. Point being you and your circumstances are completely uniqueWarren Buffet talks about the idea of maintaining an inner score card of principles to escape this girardian mimetic rat-race. Also, James Richardon, the poet, says this beautifully in his book "Vectors: Aphorisms and 10 Second Essays":
“He wants to know....
Reference
Taleb, Nicholas Nassim. (2015). Antifragile: Things that gain from disorder
